Does the thought of your teenager with a cell phone scare you? If it does, you’re like many parents trying to maintain safe perimeters with their children without inhibiting too much of their social life.
The first rule for parents whose kids have a cell phone is to set rules! It’s important to establish boundaries or your teen will end up using their phone all the time and in ways you won’t like. Here are some ideas for doing so.
1. Keep cell phone usage in check. Choose a time of evening when the phone can’t be used. This encourages your child to focus on family, homework, or anything other than checking their phone every five minutes.
2. No phones during meals.
3. No phones in the bedroom at night, or any time of day. It’s too easy for a casual conversation, whether talking or texting, to take a wrong turn in private. Plus, this keeps your teen from staying up all night on their phone. Have them plug it inside your bedroom at night.
4. Extra caution might be taken when it comes to your teenager’s boyfriend/girlfriend, or even just their crush. Some parents don’t allow their kids to text the other in the evening. If they want to talk with the person they like, they have to call. This not only allows you to make sure the conversation is appropriate, but teaches your children how to actually have conversations.
5. When friends come over, the phones go away. Teach your teen to be where they are, mentally as well as physically.
6. Check if the phone has parental controls. You can purchase apps for this. One example is Android’s “parental time control” app which lets you select the days and times your child’s phone is active.
7. If you don’t want your teen to have access to the internet, don’t buy them a phone with the internet. They’re less likely to be on their phone 24/7 if they can’t browse the web.
8. Let them pay for it. Your teen is more likely to take care of their phone when they’ve invested their own money. They might argue that if they’re paying for it, they can use the phone however they like. You might get around this by only making them pay for half the plan, letting them buy just the phone, or vice versa.
9. Hold your child responsible. If you notice their grades dropping once they have their phone, then take it away until they raise them. Set consequences for misuse and follow through when the rules are broken.
10. Set a good example. It’s harder to teach your teen to not be attached to their phone when you can’t set down your own device.
Even by setting rules, it’s impossible to control everything your child does on their phone. Education is key. Teach them about sexting, talking while driving, not sharing their number online, and telling their friends to not give out their number.
